Rosemary Lelo

How to plan a wedding when you have children

Here goes, my first attempt at a blog post.

There are so many things going through my mind as to what to write about, and I keep going back to my Master Chef watching experience, pair it back, edit what you’ve got on your plate and less is more. I am also drawing on my writing experiences as a young adult when so many of my chosen audience told me to write what I know. And well, we all know that I know about weddings. But what’s also foremost for me right now are my children. So here is the first edition of Rosemary Writes – Weddings.

How to plan a wedding when you have children!

I have no idea how this actually takes place! Everything these days seems to be done from in front of a computer, and my only computer time is when I’m at work (and I can only use that computer for actual work work) or when my girls are at kindy. And then it’s hard to actually let myself do anything other than catch up on house work, work on my Celebrant work, or you know, Facebook.

 Photo supplied by Lisa Trusler Photography

kids at wedding 

So, as I got married before we were blessed with children (cause that’s what they are right? I think of them like that 99% of the time … I digress), here are a few of my tips that I employ when I’ve got work to get done and only a small amount of screen/alone time to achieve it in.

  1. Have a plan
  2. Have a list. Delegate: divide and conquer. Just because the men folk say they don’t want to be involved in the wedding planning etc doesn’t mean you have to listen to them! Get them a list of their own, a time frame in which to complete it in, and then trust them to do it!
  3. Alone time. If you can’t have time together as a couple, be ok doing the tasks individually
  4. Take the help that is offered. Mainly around child care. You probably have a vision of your wedding day, so doing let go of the wedding planning stuff, but let people look after your littles and feed them etc.
  5. Team work: Get your girls around, be it your bridal party or just a big group of friends. If you’re on the DIY track, this is called a working bee and the bees usually bring wine, so it’s a win win!
  6. If you know it’s going to be near impossible to achieve what you want to achieve, then give yourselves more time to plan your wedding, push the date out. Or
  7. Pair it back! Less is more. Don’t put pressure on yourselves to have the ‘perfect wedding’ no one knows what’s going on in your head, only you know if you’ve got YOUR perfect wedding.
  8. Have fun! Try to be as relaxed about it as possible. It is only one day remember!

  adam and rosie

If I was planning my wedding today, post children, the things I would do differently are:

  1. No bridal party. Just us and the kids if they want to hang round our heals.
  2. 10am ceremony not 4pm, kids will be too tired and so will we TBH.
  3. Less guests. Just immediate family and close friends. Not friends who invited us to their wedding, and that lady down the road who we say hi to every now and then.
  4. Shorter lead time. Instead of 1.5 years planning, probably 6 months or less.
  5. And probably in winter, cause later when I want to celebrate my anniversary without kids around, then I don’t want to have to pay top dollar for that trip away cause everyone else is on their anniversary holiday too!

Happy planning!


(my wedding photos were shot by Mel Mason Photography)